Hi, Remember Me?
I'm Your Missing Sock.

by doug, the missing sock

At first I just thought it was a little game you and I were playing.   I mean I had been in the rotation for so long I was convinced of my future election to the Foot Covering Hall of Fame.

What did I do?   I promise I will never again complain about going out to a fancy restaurant while you are wearing dark slacks.   Slide me across the wood floor a few more times, I can take it!   Make me swallow another fistful of quarters, and lets go hit your younger brother!   How did it get to this point?

I spent my first wash cycle without my sole mate clinging to the outer limits of the washing machine as I had so many times.   I kept looking across that crowded spinning barrel and thinking I saw her, but it was just some sock with similar toe coloration.

Then you came and emptied out that load, and I somehow got nudged off the back of the drier into that nasty alley where all the dirty lint gangs hang out.   They soon had me covered from mid shin to toe in their filth.

I realize now that on my own, I just can't move as well as when we are together.   I'm sorry if I doubted our chemistry.   So there I was stuck in the shadows, in need of some major mobility.

That's where Jinx your cat comes in.   At first I thought maybe you had orchestrated a rescue mission.   But then I found myself in her cat box being toyed with like a dead mouse.

She got bored with me in a few days and dragged me behind the couch.   All I could do was lie there and wallow in my misery.

Then it happened.

From behind the couch I made out your socked feet entering the room.   I once again saw my perfect match...

And then I saw my replacement a step behind her.   He even stepped in front of her, as if to taunt me.   Then they resumed the little dance I thought was our little secret.

I couldn't believe she would pick him!   I mean he had this unseemly off white complexion with a hole in the pinky slot.   At his collar there were threads hanging down.   He was everything that I never wanted to be.

How could you do this to me?   All you had to do was look behind the drier?   That's all you ever have to do!   We are always right there!   I've heard the same sock story from a hundred threaded tubes before.   And now I understand their plight.

Maybe Jinx will pretend I'm a motionless mouse and end this.   I can't hold on to the memory of what we had together much longer.   Especially now that I've been replaced.